Baby Photos

Taking pictures of my grandchildren falls under the category of "you can never have too many!". I love to capture their expressions in different situations and I especially love to share these pictures with my friends. In fact, years ago, one of my friends commented that they hoped I didn't have too many grand kids because her refrigerator was already filled with so many photos of Maddy.
I recently read that a university in Scotland planted 240 wallets throughout the city to see how many were returned based upon their contents. None of the wallets contained money, but each had a photo of either a baby, a family, an elderly couple, or a dog. Overall people turned in 42 percent of the wallets, but the returns depended on the contents. Eighty-eight percent of the baby-photo wallets came back. Do babies universally pull at our heartstrings? Are we all suckers for that sweet baby face, even if we don't know the baby? Maybe babies represent the future and hope and promise. How can anyone turn their backs on those things? We could all use a little more hope and promise, so, quick, go get yourself a baby photo for your wallet. It just may be the ultimate pocket protector!

Bucket O Fun

I am once again reminded that it is the simplest things that can make the grand kids happy. Michael's has these buckets on sale for $1.00 each. I bought 10! Yes, I am a little over board, but where else can you get this much joy for only one dollar?? I gave them each one and we spent almost an hour before and after dinner last night playing in the sand, water and mud. Their imaginations were running wild and what a wonderful things it was to be able to witness it. Maddy made a cake complete with a lemon on top from their tree in the yard. Jack made roads and lakes with water. Abbey wanted me to make sand castles that she promptly stomped on as fast I made them and laughed each time.
We think they need countless toys under the tree at Christmas or a mound for their birthday. They are actually happy with simple things that let them imagine and explore and, yes, get dirty and messy. They are even happier when we take the time to stay and explore with them. Time wins out over toys every day!
I am delighted that I can still make them happy for only one dollar. I am even happier that they still want me to play with them.

Directions VS Scenery

I read a book once where the woman said she was so busy looking at the map, she forgot to look out the window. I think I am also guilty of this statement.
If you ask my family, I am the cruise director, planner and "boss lady" for most of our events. I don't just mean vacations or outings, but day-to-day planning like meals, shopping, etc. Most of the time, I enjoy this role; I self-created it. Being in control is where I like to be and, for the most part, my family just lets me go and do my thing. After all this time, they reason it is easier to just go along with the way I have planned things than to challenge me. For the most part, my organization and skills as "boss lady" means the others can relax and go with the flow. They get to spend a lot of time looking out the window while I read the map. As I said, I enjoy the role, for the most part. But occasionally, I would like to put down the map and look out the window also. What prevents me from doing this? Not my family, that's for sure. They tell me the only reason they defer to my plans is that I seem to need to make them. They say they really don't care. They say that things will probably work out fine even if I don't make the elaborate plans. I can feel my palms get sweaty just hearing them say these words! Can they possibly be right? I fear finding out and yet, at times, I am weary from being the "boss lady". I feel out of answers and ideas. I am tired. I want to stop looking at the map all the time and look out the window a little more. I just can't figure out how to refold this darn map!

Just Do It

"Runners just do it ~ they run for the finish line even if someone else has reached it first."
Today marks the first time that I have rerun a 5K race that I did before. In fact, the Newport Beach Spirit Run was the first 5K Sean and I ever ran when we started training last year. I am proud to say I came in 3rd in my age division with a respectable time of 30:26. It is the second best time I have ever run in all ten of the races I've entered. When they posted the results, I can't lie, I was SO excited! I waited around an extra half hour just to collect my silly third place medal. All the way home, I kept saying to my husband, "I finished third!!" I could tell he was really proud of me and it meant so much. I mean, after 35+ years together, there may seem like there are not many surprises left, but I could tell he was really proud of me. I have never been an athlete, never cared that I wasn't, but here I am doing something totally new and out of my comfort zone. Not only am I doing it, but I am achieving a measure of personal success at it as well.
I don't write about this to impress you, the reader. I write about it in the hopes that I may inspire you to try something you never thought you'd do, something out of your comfort zone. It need not be running; only you can decide what it should be. The point is, it can be ANYTHING you set your mind to do. We humans can adapt, change and grow if we take it just one step at a time and JUST DO T!!

Clean Windows

I saw a talk show this morning that said the number one easy thing you can do to make your house feel refreshed is to simply clean the windows. It got me thinking about what we do to make ourselves feel refreshed.
If you have plenty of time and money, vacation always sounds like a good way to get refreshed. However, have you ever come home from a trip and proclaimed that you need a vacation from the vacation?! Thinking on a smaller scale, I think I get refreshed on my morning runs. I mentally plan my day, enjoy the cool breeze and the way I can push my body to keep going. I get refreshed when I read a book and get lost in the story and the characters. I feel refreshed when I get my hair done once a month and I leave knowing, yes, red really is my hair color!
What refreshs you? Think small scale and realize that we have the ability to get refreshed more often than we allow ourselves. We are so busy looking for the big vacation, the big pay day, the big "thing", that we miss the small, golden moments that can refresh us if we just allow it. Vow today to refresh yourself in some small way...even if you have to wash the windows!

Memories

Last night, we met friends for dinner. They were in town and we had not seen them in ages. We were neighbors in Irvine 30 years ago. It was a wonderful 3 hours of reminiscing and laughing and catching up. What struck me during dinner was that memories of people can be varied. What I remember may not be what they remember. I don't mean that we remember the event differently, but WHAT stays in our brain may be some small thing. For example, I remember going over to their house for dinner one night and they served a wine called Gewurztraminer. It was, by my wine taste today, a VERY sweet wine. Back then, I loved it and felt terribly sophisticated drinking it. Over the years, whenever I would see a bottle of it in the store, I would think of our old neighbors. They didn't even recall that dinner, but remembered that we had also drank that wine on a trip we took together to Solvang. Each of us had our own memories; little events that remain with us over the years.
We were discussing memories in a book club I once belonged to and someone asked, "How do you know it's YOUR memory and not something your parents told you about or showed you old photos. You had seen the pictures so many times, you almost thought you DID remember the event, but were actually too young. One woman said she knew the memory was her own because of smells. A certain smell of cooking always reminded her of being in her grandmother's kitchen. She says the smell takes her right back to that place. Some felt the same way about a color. Their mother or grammie had a dress that color and it always made them think of them wearing it.
Memory is tenuous. As we age, we forget many things. Someone told me, what we start to forget is "noun retrieval" ~ person, place or thing. We know we know the name; we just can't quite grab it at the moment and say it. I have experienced this often. Frustrating! Some say they can remember a memory from 20 years ago better than what they ate for breakfast yesterday!
Wouldn't it be lovely if we could make a list of memories we wanted to keep forever and a list of those we want to forget forever? I would toss out the loud fights my parents had before their ugly divorce. I would toss out the unkind comments people have made that left me feeling worthless. I would toss recurring nightmares. I would keep forever the look my husband gave me at a high school party from across the room 39 years ago ~ a look that told me he adored me. I would keep forever the sound of my 3 grandchildren calling my name when I arrive. I would keep forever Maddy's demand for the departing ritual of "hug, kiss, lick".
Hopefully, as I get older, someone will read me this blog and I will be reminded what things mattered to me, that I mattered.

Spring

"No matter how long the winter, spring is sure to follow."
The time change has me thinking about longer days, spring followed by summer, etc. However, I think this quote speaks more to an outlook on life than the seasons. Are you more of a pessimist or an optimist? Do you think mostly good will happen or are you constantly waiting for the next bad thing to occur in your life?
Most people seem to lean one way or the other. That's not to say that it is all good or all bad. As I have said before, life is messy, but it also has some pretty great parts too. Can our outlook change the amount of good or bad we receive in our life? Probably not, and I don't think that is the point. I just finished an article in one of my running magazines and the topic was, "Act as if...". Act as if you will finish the race. Act as if you will win. Act as if you can keep going when it seems you cannot. Is this lying to yourself or is this positive imagery? Call it what you will, what if it works, or at the very least, helps us get through life's challenges? I have often given out a much more positive vibe than I have felt with clients. After all, I am in sales. I have to "act as if.." when I don't always feel it. This is really tough in a down economy and, yet, more necessary now than ever. People get plenty of doom and gloom by turning on the TV or reading the newspaper. I can't turn the economy around, but I can offer them a little sunshine and springtime. I just need to remember to save a little for myself and my family!

Holiday Cards

I love to make holiday cards. They always contain a photo and a silly saying ~ my trademark, I guess you could say. It started when our kids were young and I tortured the family every Christmas with my ideas. When the grand babies arrived, I realized I had an even better reason to make cards to share with my friends. I make cards for Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day and Easter. I have made dozens over the years, but this one still remains one of my favorites. Here's beautiful Maddy, about six months old, plopped in a giant planter. I love the look on her face, "Grammie, what are you making me do?!?!" I love her little, fat hands holding onto the sides of the pot.
Over the years, with the addition of Jack and Abbey, I find my ideas get harder and harder to execute. Capturing THREE busy, little bodies at once is not easy, if not impossible. They often don't share my enthusiasm for the creative ideas I dream up. I have resorted to taking individual pictures of them and making montage photo cards. The results are no less adorable and they remind me, once again, that plans must be flexible. I'm learning kids, I'm learning.

F.Y.I.

Someone who reads my blog told me that when she went to comment, you have to click twice to get it to post. The first time it says there is an error, but if you click again, it will add your comment. Just wanted to let readers know this. Maybe you wanted to comment and thought it didn't work. Either way, thanks for reading.

In Five Years...

My daughter said the other night that, so far, 2010 has not been a very good year. I think she gave it a "3" on a scale of 1 - 10. That being said, no one is sick, no one has died, we have all have a roof over our heads and food a plenty. A bunch of little, crummy things have happened that really can make life feel messy, annoying and less than great. This messiness came to mind when I read this sentence today. Through all of life's situations, you must always ask yourself ~ "In five years, will this matter?"
If we continue to ask ourselves if this, whatever "this" is for us today, will matter in five years, it forces us to put it in perspective and and not let it consume us. I remember back when my son wore his pants so low you could see most of his boxers. It made me annoyed every time I looked at him. My husband, old soul that he has always been, would continually say, "Does it really matter?" I thought his sloppy appearance reflected on my mothering skills and I was embarrassed. Today, he wears his pants like any other grown up. He is neat and tidy about his appearance. Does THIS reflect on my mothering skills any more than the low pants did? Probably not. It reflects to what was cool and fashionable to a young teenager versus a twenty something adult.
The next time you feel weighed down by something going on in your life, remember to ask yourself the question, "In five years, will this matter?" Kind of takes the steam out of many arguments and the anxiety out of many situations. Just breathe!

Compliments

I am a great giver. I am a lousy receiver. I would rather give the party than be the guest. I would rather give the gift than receive one. I would rather give the compliment than receive one. My family accuses me of ruining every compliment they have ever tried to give me. They are probably right. Where a gracious "Thank You" is enough of a response, I tend to tear apart what they've just said and therefore ruin the spirit in which it was given. I spoil the gift they just gave me because, for some reason, I don't feel worthy of receiving it.
Deflecting a compliment is like returning a gift and you wouldn't return a gift to the sender, would you? Why do I feel that is okay to do with a compliment? From now on, I am going to strive to both give AND receive compliments graciously. So, for any of you readers out there, if you want to leave a comment (compliment), I will practice on you. For taking the time to read the things I reflect upon and write, I graciously say THANK YOU!

Dinners Out

Last night, we went out for pizza with all the kids. We met, who we lovingly refer to as, "The Other Svobodas". All in all, the kids were really good. Amber and I scored it an 8 out of 10. This is not to say that Jack's favorite part of the evening was showing everyone his awesome burping ability. Abbey spent much of the time shaking the Parmesan cheese out of the shaker onto the table (hey, it kept her quiet!) Maddy wanted me to cut her pizza very specifically - first piece had to have the pepperoni pulled off but keep the cheese, the second had to have the pepperonis still intact, and the third piece (yes, she ate 3!) was not to be cut at all.
We got in the car and Amber asked if The Other Svobodas really want to meet us for pizza or do they feel obligated to do so? We worry that what we accept as a normal level of noise and craziness from the kids, may make others cringe with annoyance. There is an element of truth to the fact that we can tune out much of the noise our brood produces. It often becomes apparent to us that getting take out and eating at home is less stressful than worrying about who will have a meltdown, who will we disturb at another table, who will Pa have to take outside for a walk. Knowing all these possibilities exist, now and then, we still take them out for dinner. There are several reasons. One, they do need to learn to behave in a restaurant. Another reason is that we are a family and families eat together. We come together and eat, drink, laugh & share. We hide our smiles behind a napkin when Jack practices his burping. We also teach them manners and respect. We listen to their stories.
We will continue taking them out for dinner in restaurants. Well, we will until Jack learns how to do arm farts!

Love You

People talk about a life changing event that makes them realize how precious and tenuous life really is. It seems to take something big and usually awful (illness, death, accidents) to slap us up the side of the head and remember what really matters. Sad but true. Rushing through our daily lives, trying to just make it another day with all the demands and pressures, we don't stop and appreciate what we have.
I just finished reading a book (true story) about a man who lost his 38 year old daughter and how devastating this was for him and his entire family. He experienced many things from his grief, but one thing he decided was that he wanted to start ending all his phone calls to his family, and even some friends, with "Love you." This may seem like a small thing, but it got me thinking. My daughter and I talk on the phone many times throughout the day. I noticed that she almost always ends our calls with, "Love you." Before, my response ranged from, "Talk to you later." to "Love you." Now I make sure I say it. I am trying to end my calls with all my family by saying it. I'd like to move on to friends, but part of me wonders how it will be received. They are precious and close friends who matter greatly in my life. What if something happened to them and I recall that the last conversation I had with them ended in, "Talk to you later."? We know we all love each other; we just don't say it much. We assume there will always be another time to be together, another phone conversation, another time to say it. And there's the catch - life is tenuous and nothing is guaranteed. I better get in all the "Love yous" that I can. I challenged you to do the same.
Love you,

The Next Generation

So, I pull into a drive thru Starbucks this morning with Abbey (age 2) in the back, and she shouts, "COFFEE!!" Am I the only one that thinks that is both hysterical and ridiculous?! This generation will only know a world with drive thru coffee, instant messaging & texting. What else will they think is common place that once didn't exist?
When our kids began walking we put little plastic thingies in the wall sockets. Today, you hire a specialist to baby proof your entire house for $1200! I can still remember the first time I was babysitting and went to the bathroom at my daughter's after it was "baby proofed". It had some sort of locking devise on the toilet that assured a toddler would not fall in and drown. It almost assured that a grammie would pee her pants trying to figure out how to open it!
Today, schools keep you informed via blogs and emails. We can talk to people on the computer (Skype) and actually see them even if they are thousands of miles away. I can write the silly thoughts I have in my head and think that somebody might actually want to read them.
No matter how far technology has come, I still firmly believe that you can give a kid a big box, a roll of tape or some blankets and they will make cars, houses, tents and anything else their imagine will allow. And, that, will never change from generation to generation. They just may make a car out of a box so they can drive thru Starbucks!

Faces

These three pictures made me laugh out loud yesterday & I couldn't resist sharing them. First, Pa was being very silly with the Dr. Laura head. Something about that woman's tiny head on his big body caused me to run for my camera! Next is Baby Abbey cuddled up with two of her favorite things, Pa & his cell phone. Why do kids LOVE real cell phones so much? I have tried to buy each of the three kids toy, but real looking cell phones, but none hold the fascination of the one in Pa's pocket of his tee shirt. The last picture is one of "the looks" Abbey gives. I mean this girl can give out the "stink eye" look like a pro. She lets you know, in no uncertain terms, that she's not buying whatever it is you are trying to sell her! I laugh every time she does it.

Simple daily pleasures, folks, simple daily pleasures! Don't overlook yours.

New Beginnings

I was that kid that loved the beginning of the school year. The shiny new binder with perfectly sharpened #2 pencils held such promise and excitement of things to come. Now, as an adult, there are no new school years for me. I still like the beginning of things, though. Turning over the calendar this morning to a brand new month made me smile; another beginning that holds promise and, if I'm lucky, a little excitement.
What is beginning in your life? Are you open to new beginnings or do you shy away from them? I sometimes joke that the only thing I have stuck with in my life is my marriage! Everything else tends to become boring and mundane and I crave that feeling of newness that gets my brain juices flowing. I master something and want to move on to the next something. I often wonder if this is a flaw or quality in my personality. Too bad it can no longer be satisfied with a couple of sharp #2 pencils!