Heart Rocks

I collect heart rocks. Yes, some are from stores and they are shaped perfectly. Somehow, their perfection diminishes their value. Truly great heart rocks are found by chance. I have found them camping, walking and in unlikely places. These rocks may not be an exact heart, but they still look like a heart and stand out among other rocks. I admit, each time I find one, my own heart beats a little faster. It is exciting and unexpected to find a heart rock in nature. The discovery fills me with happiness. It reminds me that amid all the dirt and dust of life, there is still beauty and wonder. You just have to keep looking for it, one rock at a time.

What's in a Name?

Reading this morning's paper, I saw that Pippa Middleton, sister of Prince William's wife, Kate, will become a columnist for a monthly magazine published by an upscale British grocery store. It will cover casual dining ideas and recipes.  Now, this got me to thinking. Why is it that, if you have a famous relative, or a famous last name, people jump at the chance to let you write a book, a column, etc?
Anyone who knows me, would probably say I could write such a column. I love to cook and entertain and often make fabulous suggestions for these very things. How come nobody is calling me to write a column? I am convinced, it's my last name!! I have no rich and famous relatives. I have no movie stars in my family heritage. I don't travel in international circles. Oh, I've had a few things published: a poem in a magazine, a letter to the editor, an article in a hockey magazine, a column in the church bulletin and this silly blog. Hardly, earth shaking stuff and very small scale. Many would be satisfied with this, but not me. I always thought by now, I would be rich and famous and I find myself neither. Harsh reality!
Hey, George Clooney! I know you don't want to ever get married, but would you be willing to adopt me? I think a book by George's daughter would be at instant best seller. Susan Clooney....I like the sound of that!!

Check it Off the List

Bucket List:" things you want to do before you die (kick the bucket!!)"
Bucket lists are as different as people. Some things on them are huge and some are small. By many standards, this one may be silly. I have always wanted to see every one of the movies up for best picture one year. In any given year, I am lucky if I see one or two that make this esteemed list. I mentioned this wish to my dear friend, JoEllen, and, in true Jo fashion, without missing a beat, she said, "I'm in. Let's do it!"
So, from when the nominees were announced in mid January to the Academy Awards (which are this Sunday), we went and saw all nine movies. I usually don't see 9 movies at the theater in a year, let alone within 6 weeks!
I must say, if they had not been on the list, several of these movies held no interest for me. I was not excited to see all of them, but a challenge is a challenge. A few turned out to be better than I imagined and I am so glad I saw them. Some were disappointing and some bore the question, "How did this movie even make the list?!" I give a mini review of each below, but the real value of this adventure is twofold. First, big or small, we must challenge ourselves to do things that are not always easy. We must believe in ourselves to try new things and know we can accomplish what we set out to do. Second, the biggest value I achieved from checking this off my bucket list is,  I did it with someone who means a great deal to me. The experience was cool, sharing the experience was priceless. Thanks for the laughs, JoEllen. Memories shared are the glue of friendship.

Amour -Getting old sucks & is depressing, even worse in a tiny french apartment.
Argo - You knew the outcome (it's history) & yet it kept you on the edge of your seat!
Beasts of the Southern Wild - How do people live in such poverty & yet still find small joys?
Django - Bloodiest movie I have ever seen & I laughed out loud!
Les Miserables - Saw this twice as a play & the movie is no less depressing. Ugh!
Life of Pi - Glad I didn't read the book. Ambiguous ending left me flat.
Lincoln - I had low expectations of this one &, IT WAS THE BEST OF ALL!! Loved it!!
Silver Lining Playbook - Once again confirms, all families are crazy.
Zero Dark Thirty - So incredibly boring & left me wondering why it made the list!

Reflection

Dear Tyler:
      Birthdays are often a time of reflection, looking at the past and wondering about the future. This picture was taken for your First Communion in the second grade. Second grade was also the year you told me, in front of your teacher, that you hated school and never wanted to go back! Yes, it has been a rocky journey for you at times. You always seemed to see things differently than others. You thought that made you odd, but it actually made you feel things more deeply and that can be a double-edged sword.
      We had many battles while you were growing up, each of us thinking we were on opposite sides and the other one was wrong. Words and actions that can hurt each other, did. We had wounds that we refused to let heal. Who would ever have thought that they would heal at all? But, as I sit writing this letter, on the anniversary of your birth, I can clearly say they have healed. We have gone from silence, to wary, stilted conversations where we both feared we would say something to piss the other one off, to actual great conversations.
      Today, I am overjoyed to say, you call me on your way home from work just to "touch base". I can text you that I am feeling blue and having a bad day and you get it, because you have been there too. You can make me laugh more than most people because you have a clever wit that I love. You are generous to a fault with those in your life. You give and give, with both actual gifts and the gifts within you. Admonishing you to stop does not work. Your giving is your way of showing how much you love. You are a survivor, you've proven that many times. You have become a teacher of a game you love so deeply and that is a skill not everyone possesses. You see "the diamond in the rough" in many kids, because YOU were a diamond in the rough.
     Most parents only want their kids to be happy, productive citizens. I can honestly say, I feel you have achieved this. I am so proud of you.
Love,
Mom

To the Moon & Back

Abigail is, without a doubt, a unique child with a mind of her own. I was not present when this photo was taken, but my guess is, her mother said, "Look at me and smile." Here is the response to that command!! Although her strong will can make you crazy, it is also that uniqueness that will be a valuable tool throughout her life. Who wants to be a sheep? Being your own person is way better!
She and I have a "thing" we do when we are together. Each of us tries to be the first one to say, "I love you to the moon and back." The other always says, "Ahhh, you got me!" Not sure how it started, but I hope it never ends!
Abigail, I love you to the moon and back!

Kids Creations

Here are the kid's valentines that we made this year. Each reflects their personality. Jack insisted his not be "girly" or" lovey-dovey". The rulers with "You Rule" seemed to meet his requirements. Abbey's smiling face and reaching hand with the sucker makes me smile. Maddy, getting older and, clearly with a mind of her own, had a hard time deciding on the project. I must have offered up 5 or 6 ideas that were all shot down until we came upon this cute butterfly. She helped me every step of the way, or should I say, I helped HER!!?? She even said, "You know, Grammie, most people wouldn't go to the trouble of adding the googly eyes, but WE DO!" Ahhh, that's my girl!!!

A Deck of Cards

"Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade."
I am not sure why, but this saying made me laugh out loud! I have been married a long time. There have been ups and downs. There have been good years and bad years. There have been times when I have considered getting in the car and driving away. He probably has too. Even in its darkest times, I still would wonder if it might get better, if I should stay and find out. And here I am. It ebbs and flows.
After posting this blog, I am afraid to Google "club" or "spade" for fear it may incriminate me! 

Valentine Card

Here is my valentine for 2013. I absolutely LOVE that Jack is sticking out his tongue. See, he didn't want to put on the moustache and I had to use every bit of persuasion I could think of to get him to do it, even for a few seconds to snap some photos. Much like my own children, these three are not always keen on my hair-brained ideas for "cute cards" with even cuter sayings!

This is how he actually wanted to wear it and, frankly, it is SO JACK!!!

Either way, it shares the love!!

Run, Grammie, Run

 

 "In running, it doesn't matter whether you come in first, in the middle of the pack, or last. You can say, 'I have finished.' There is a lot of satisfaction in that."

-Fred Lebow, New York City Marathon co-founder

It's been one year since I ran in a half marathon. I was very nervous to even attempt it on Sunday. The last one I ran was the same race, Surf City Half Marathon in Huntington Beach, where I experienced such bad leg cramps, it made me cry. My calm, utterly logical husband kept saying it was okay to walk briskly either part or the whole race. Just finish to prove to yourself you can still do it. 

I am so happy to report that I did finish with no leg cramps and a pretty decent time for an old broad! I ran most of it and did allow myself a few "brisk walk" breaks as well. My time was not my best, but definitely not my worst. I was very satisfied with my results.

For non runners, it is hard to explain how running makes you feel. It is the body often saying it doesn't want to do this, but your mind overrules and says, oh yes, you will. The satisfaction that comes from running is a heady drug. It clears out  the cobwebs that get in your head and helps you to see things clearer. It forces you to choose determination rather than defeat. It changes your body, yes, but your mind even more.

The day after: a little stiff, a little sore, VERY satisfied!

Sick Bay

This past week has seen many people in our family down with the flu...BAD!! I am a terrible nurse. What do you mean you don't feel well? Get up and go to work...or school...or wherever you're supposed to be!! I like to be left alone when I am (rarely) sick and I try to give others the same treatment.
Ask my kids. When they were young, if you weren't throwing up, off to school you went. Amber still reminds me of the time she vomited in the hallway at school. When I picked her up, her first words were, "I TOLD you I was sick!!!"
I don't mean to be heartless. I just want everyone to be well and happy and regular! NOW!!!
Here's my advice: Drink loads of water & wash your hands often. And if you get sick, call me when it's over!!
aka Heartless