Expanding World

If became painfully clear to me today that Maddy's world is expanding. She is in the second half of kindergarten and they are reading like my kids never did at that age. I am amazed and impressed! She is sounding out words, constantly asking what it spells, etc. Her world is quickly expanding. On the other hand, this new found knowledge is starting to limit her mother's and my world. Where we used to get by with spelling something we didn't want her to know, she now either figures it out or asks a lot of questions. If we say, "It's time for b-e-d.", she quickly says, "I'm not ready to go to bed!!" I have XM Radio in my car and have it set where it lists the artist and song that is currently being played. Today, while she was in the backseat, the song by AC/DC "Highway to Hell" came on. She asked me the title and I said "Highway". She immediately looked at the screen and read "Highway to Hell" Isn't hell a bad word, grammie?? Ahhh, busted!!! I had to laugh. It reminded me of the saying ~ I wish I were half as smart as my young child thought and half as dumb as my teenager thinks! She is six going on sixteen. I hope I can keep up!

Questions

Actual questions asked by Jack this morning:
"Do toys get germs?" "Why?" "What is the Tower of Terror?" "Why?" "Is Texas where they round up cows?" "Why?" "What is blame?" "Why?" "How do you do that?" "Why?"
These are only the ones I can remember. There were plenty more. The constant litany of questions can drive any adult crazy ~ even the sweetest, kindest, most patient grammie ever! It seems most kids go through this stage of asking questions. As much as it may drive us crazy, it is an important part of growing up and realizing how expansive the world is and how many things they have to learn. It is the job of the adults in their life to answer any and all questions we possibly can for them. This is how they learn, not only the answer, but that we are there for them and will be every step of the way. They ask the questions, not just for the answer, but for our attention. They crave it. They demand it. They are relentless in their pursuit of it. The quicker we stop what we are doing, look at them, listen and answer, the easier it is for all of us. I only wish knowing all the answers was that easy!

Par-tay

If I had to find one constant aspect of when I felt happy, I would have to say it is when my house is filled with people. Yes, it's a lot of work preparing, it's a lot of work when they are here and it's also a lot of work to clean up after them. Doesn't much sound like a recipe for happiness, does it, and yet, it really does make me happy.
Planning each detail, or over-planning as my family accuses me each time, is something I do well. I love to take a get-together from concept to completion and know that I thought of everything to make it special for all the guests. I can look out during any party and see people laughing, interacting, eating and enjoying each other with gusto. Yes, it makes me happy. It's kind of like building a puzzle at the dining room table. Piece by piece it comes together, frustrating at times, and yet, when it's completed, you stand back and admire your handiwork and you know it was worth the effort.

Eats!

These words are on the wall in my dining room. Out of all the sayings I could have put in my house, this one means the most to me. Food is the common denominator with people. We invite people to our home to share a meal. We meet a friend for coffee. We plan a night out and it usually includes eating somewhere. Food and people go together.
Many an evening is spent with all of us gathered around the table, eating, talking, laughing, refereeing the kids. The noise level usually rises to such a point that it makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up! And yet, we keep coming back for more ~ and I don't mean just the food. We keep coming back to be together, to share the best part of our day. Cooking Sunday night dinners with my son-in-law is one of the highlights of my week. I am always a little sad when his work travels keep him away on Sundays as it feels incomplete without this ritual we have established.
These meals we share while gathered around the table, not only feed our bodies, but they nourish our souls.

Facebook vs Face to Face

Facebook is and can be a very fun way to keep up with people. Sharing photos across the world in an instant is a wonderful tool. Having someone comment on one of your posts can make you feel like somebody cares or is listening. However, many studies have been done recently about how we connect with people and how it affects our feelings and moods. Despite all the technology at our fingertips, it has been been proven over and over that about half the brain's cerebral vortex, where social cues are processed, is devoted to visual input. In simple terms, that means that reading an email or text from someone is not nearly as powerful as spending time with them interacting face to face. I guess technology keeps us in touch without really touching.
How many times have you received a text and thought it meant something totally different than the sender intended? We need to see some one's face, hear their voice inflection and be able to react to the whole person, not just written words on a page or phone.
I have done my best to keep up with technology and how it helps our lives, but it will never replace good old-fashioned "meet for coffee" friends. I will continue to make the effort to interact with many, stay in touch with a few and bare my soul - in person - to one or two. I hope this generation of parents teaches their children that nothing beats face-to-face friends who make us feel valued and loved. Their happiness as adults depends upon it.

Fake It

I have been awake since 4am this morning. An early riser by nature, I went to bed way too early last night and so I decided to get up and be productive. I've already done two loads of laundry, had my coffee, read the newspaper, straightened up the house, planned the weeks menus and made a grocery list, all before 7am. After all that, I sat for a few minutes and read my current book. This line jumped out from the page and really hit me ~ "Smiles can be little contentment generators: when you pretend to feel a few clicks better than you really are, you actually get some small upturn in your mood."
We live in a society that says, "Be real. Be who you are. Be yourself." This is all well and good, however, many people could do with a little dose of what this quote is trying to teach - fake it til you make it. Waiting for life to get easier, for it to get less complicated, for it to be less stressful, for the dark cloud to stop looming over our head only leaves us waiting. Waiting is not living. It is limbo. Limbo sucks as far as I am concerned.
Truth be told, faking it a little actually does make you feel better. It may not last, but it can be a momentary bright spot in an otherwise cloudy day. Using that 1 - 10 scale, whatever number you are feeling today, pretend it is a number or two higher than it really is. Experiment and see if, when you lay your head on the pillow tonight, it did make you feel just a little bit better. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Knock! Knock!

You know how the doorbell rings and you open up to one of those annoying salesmen who "aren't trying to sell you anything, but just want to tell you about what they have to offer?!" Well, not this time! I opened my door to this pinkalicious, little beauty. I don't care what she's selling ~ I'm buying!!! Happy Friday!!

Let's Party!

OK, I admit it! I LOVE to plan a party. I love combing magazines, the Internet and TV shows for ideas and inspiration. While some people cringe at the thought of giving a party, I can feel my heart rate quicken and the creative juices start to flow. Pulling out that clean, lined tablet that will be used for lists and time lines gives me a feeling of excitement. I never doubt that it will be less than wonderful and fun for both the guest of honor and all the other attendees. One idea leads me to another idea and I am off and running. Putting all the pieces together and making them fit is my idea of fun. Making people smile and say, "That was just the way I'd hoped it would be!" is the greatest complement I can receive.
So...I guess this makes me a Party Girl! HA!

Flowers

"Bread feeds the body, indeed, but flowers feed also the soul."

I watched the gardeners plants these flowers and plants today. If I had my way, I would have planted twice as many, but, as my husband always reminds me, they grow! I tend to lean toward the instant gratification with flowers, not the waiting for them to grow. March seems to tease us with the promise of spring and longer, warmer days. These beautiful yellow and orange flowers give the same promise. I smile when I look at them and they make me feel happy. Gardens, like life, take work, but it is worth it. I hope I remember that when I am weeding!

Duh - Winning!

If you have been living in a cave, perhaps you have not heard the latest catch phrase sweeping America, if not the world ~ "Duh! Winning!" coined by Charlie Sheen on many interviews this week. I have mixed emotions about this whole story. Why can't someone with so much talent and even more money behave himself? Is his self destruct button so large that he is willing to throw it all away? Is he capable of pulling himself together?
Many of us shake our head and wish we had the means to say exactly what we are thinking at any given moment. Crazy or sane, he is spouting whatever comes into his mind at the time it does. When I do this, my husband tells me I have no filters!! Between what my brain is thinking and what comes out of my mouth ~ no filters!! This can be a problem for us non-Charlie Sheen folks living regular lives in suburbia. Believe me, I know! We are held to a standard in society that expects us to have filters for many areas of our lives. I think that may be one reason, besides the fact that they are perfect and beautiful, that I love my grandchildren so much. They have no filters! They say what is on their mind with no apology. Old people seem to do the same thing. We spend a lot of time in between youth and old age tempering what we think and say. Is it necessary for modern, civilized society or just another burden we carry?
Duh ~ winning! Why didn't I think of that?!?!

Ageless Joy

Yesterday, I had the privilege of creating a birthday party for a lady who turned 88 years young. She was so delighted with everything, it made me smile long after the party was over. Her friends, also abundant in years, all seemed happy to be sharing the day with her. She noted every little thing we did and how beautiful everything was. No detail went unnoticed.

What makes people age with joy or age with bitterness? It seems there is no in between. Life has a way of beating us up. How do some people come out the other end grateful to be here while others see no joy? My daughter constantly tells me she will not allow me to stop finding joy in daily life when I am older. She will haul my sorry, old bones around to the family functions. She will keep me involved and active. She will remind me it is better than the alternative. She will be right!