Sunshine in the Mail

What does your mail consist of these days? If it’s like mine, it consists mostly of advertisements (ugh) and bills (double ugh). Nothing very exciting or uplifting, to say the least. I decided I can’t change my own mail, but I can change other people’s. Now, whenever I see an article in the newspaper or a magazine that reminds me of someone, I tear it out, slap a little note on it that reads, “Saw this and thought of you.” and pop both in the mail to them. The key is, I do it right away!   Leaving it to do later usually means never! Just think, when they open their mail box, there among the bleak adult “stuff” is a tiny ray of sunshine. They open it to find nothing very important and, yet, may make them feel they are important enough for someone to take the time to send them this. What an easy, inexpensive way to make someone’s day! I know you might say, email is more immediate, but for me, not as satisfying. 

Often, we feel we can’t do anything big or great so we do nothing, but doing something, however small, may have big returns for the recipient as well as for us. You never know what seeds you plant, what the ripple effect of kindness can change, how we touch a heart that needed it more than we could know.

For the price of a stamp, will you send someone a little sunshine?

Who's On Your Crew?

When your life is smooth sailing, anybody can ride along in your boat. It’s easy, fun and lighthearted. Unfortunately, much of life cannot be described in these terms. More often than not, we face challenges, worries and troubles that eat away at our attempt at choosing joy. Instead of smooth sailing, we experience turbulent waters that sometimes make us feel like our boat is about to capsize. Who hangs with us during these times? I bet you can count these people on one hand, but count them you should, because they are the ones that truly matter. I can steer the boat by myself when the waters are calm. It’s when the storm threatens my safety that I need a crew to help me navigate through it. That’s the time those people I counted, really count!

Who’s on your crew?

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a funny thing. We often find ourselves in a situation where we just don’t want to forgive someone for hurting or disappointing us. We reason that they don’t deserve our forgiveness. They were wrong. They were mean. However, anger and resentment are heavy stones to carry around each and every day. Forgiveness lightens that weight almost instantly.

One of the hardest people to forgive is ourselves. We put lots of pressure on being better, smarter, kinder, skinnier and so on, and when we fall short, we often cannot forgive ourselves. I was talking with a woman last week and she told me, like many people, she started the New Year with great intentions. She had been exercising and eating healthy foods, but in the last few days, she, in her words, had “fallen off the wagon”. I looked right at her and said, “Forgive yourself and move on. Start again and keep going.” The look on her face can only be described as hopeful joy. She thanked me for saying those words and said that was just what she would do. Rather than dwelling on the failure of the past few days, she would forgive herself and move forward.

I must say these words, not only to others, but to myself as well.

Will you forgive yourself and move forward today?

Invisible

I realized something a little startling the other day. Sixty plus year old women are invisible. I am invisible. To whom you may ask? To everyone is my reply. I am invisible to the people shopping in the grocery store. I am invisible to the people in line at the bank. I am invisible to the few friends that I have. I am invisible to my children. I am invisible to my husband. No one sees an older woman.  It’s not in the fabric of our society today. I go about my business with the efficiency I have always had. I get things done. I make a list. I shop for food. I cook meals. I do laundry. I pay the bills on time. I grab a coffee. I keep it all running smoothly, all the while being invisible. It’s just what happens, I guess. I still think of myself as a witty, fun 30 year old. Then I pass a mirror or see my reflection in a window and am startled that an older woman is staring back at me. I hardly know her. She dresses mostly in black these days, probably to hide her diminishing figure and her thickening middle. When did that happen? Is that when I became invisible? I see a woman who seems to add wrinkles to her face on a daily basis. When did that happen? Is that when I became invisible? I see a woman who has more time on her hands and less to do. When did that happen? Is that when I became invisible? I see that look of polite indifference on people’s faces when I start to tell a story or offer advice. When did that happen?  Is that when I became invisible? I am at the point in my life where I am buying more sympathy cards than birthday cards. When did that happen? Is that when I became invisible? It’s like I am a drawing on a piece of paper and someone has started using the eraser at the bottom of my picture moving upward, and slowly but surely, I have been disappearing for some time. The eraser will finally reach my head and then my thoughts, dreams and memories will be erased along with me. Maybe that is actually a good thing. Then I won’t remember that I am invisible.

Biggsuzi

The Theme is Imperfection

This time of year, I find photos in magazines of the "perfect Christmas tree". They are themed and beautiful and perfect. I am a person who LOVES a theme, but somehow this has never worked out on our Christmas tree. As much as part of me would love the color coordination and symmetry, I can't bring myself to create one that looks that way.
As I open the drawers where I store our ornaments, I find ones that we purchased in our travels: Hawaii, Alaska, Banff, the East Coast, Brianhead, Mexico and more. I find the homemade ones from my children where they used too much glue or wrote in an unsteady six year old hand. I find the ones with photos of my kids and grandkids that captured a moment in time never to be relived. I find the most hideous and rudimentary craft ability ones that I can't bear to toss as they were made by my sweet aunt and godmother, long dead. And they each have a spot on the tree.
My life is not perfect. Our tree is not perfect, but it is OUR tree. It speaks to who we are as a family. It remind us of fun moments we shared. It reminds us that love and people matter. It reminds us that who we are today, is partially because of where we went, who we met, and what we experienced together.
Actually, now that I think about it, it is perfect!

Long Time...No Blog

I borrowed the title of this blog from my BFF who also said it had been a long time since she blogged. Months without blogging...nothing to say or so much life, no time to say it?!

 Lots of things going on, mostly good, but, dang, life is messy too! Thank goodness it was October and the month my best friend and I take a trip. This year was a BIG one as we went all the way to the east coast for my 40th half marathon. We stayed at the Ritz Carlton and enjoyed being pampered by the hotel staff. How do they remember our names?! Kind of creepy along with classy!!

 I took this photo right before I started ,my half marathon. It was a unusually cold morning for Florida. And, while I froze waiting in the wind, I was thankful for the temperature about a half mile into the race.

 The last two tenths of the race was on the sand. It was a brutal ending, but also very memorable. My BFF was waiting at the finish line and I can't tell you how much that meant to me. I usually am solo at my races, which is fine, but when you have somebody there for you, it is the exclamation point on the 13.1 miles.

 We shopped the darling town of Amelia Island and also enjoyed some much needed down time relaxing on the beach by our hotel. Perfect weather every day, not too hot and not too cold.

 At the airport in Jacksonville, FL, they have a huge group of rocking chairs. What a fun idea for weary travelers!

We even rented a car and drove two hours to Savannah, GA and explored the city. Lunch was in a beautiful spot right on the river. We both noticed how very friendly EVERYONE was. There must be something to the "southern hospitality" people talk about as we definitely experienced it.
We spent five days laughing and talking and exploring and eating and shopping. I've said it before and I'll say it again ~ we travel well together! Lucky us!!
We are already talking about where we will go in 2017!

A Shi**y Blog

This is MY neighborhood. This is OUR neighborhood.
Yes, these are photos of dog poop!
I walk my dog two or three times a day, every day! I live in an upscale neighborhood with houses that cost a fair amount of money. I don't say this to brag, I say it to let you know how appalled I am that people do not pick up their dog's poop when they are walking them. I simply cannot understand what kind of person does this ~ thoughtless? dirty? selfish? Maybe they are perfectly lovely people in every other aspect of their life except this. Hmmm, I somehow doubt this! When my grandkids go along on the walks, I always point out the poop. I tell them that the definition of being a good citizen is doing the right thing...even when no one is looking!
This is MY neighborhood. This is OUR neighborhood.
I have a small dog which means her poops are small. I still pick them up on every walk! I buy these great bags at the dollar store (see photo). They are actually in the baby section and are scented with powder! All this for $1 and you get 75 of them!! What a deal! You don't even have to purchase poop bags. You can recycle the plastic bags you get from the grocery store and use them. For a while, someone was actually bagging up their dog's poop and then leaving it on the sidewalk, IN THE BAG!! This means they bent down, scooped it up but didn't take it with them. I know it was the same person because it was always the same blue bags. Again I ask, who does this??
This is MY neighborhood. This is OUR neighborhood.
One house I walk by just redid their landscape down the side. I am sure he spent a lot of money to have it done. It is now, riddled with dog poop throughout the bark!! I will keep asking, who does this??
Yes, there are bigger problems in the world today than dog poop riddled streets and yet maybe this speaks to an ever growing attitude of, "It's not my problem." "Let somebody else take care of things." "If I don't get caught, it doesn't count." "Who cares?" The definition of conscience is:
 "an inner feeling or voice viewed as acting as a guide to the rightness or wrongness of one's behavior"
Have we stopped listening to that inner feeling or voice? Right and wrong still exist and they make the world a more livable, civilized place. I don't always do right, none of us do, but I'd like to believe that I do what's right way more often than what's wrong. If you do right more often than wrong, it becomes your "go to", default behavior. That's how it's supposed to be. That is a good citizen.
I will keep picking up my dog's poop. I hope you will do the same.
This is MY neighborhood. This is OUR neighborhood.
Respect it!
Biggsuzi